fortune

<<set $fortune = random(1,40)>>\n<<set $number = random(1,999)>>\n<<set $mood = random(1,10)>>\n<<set $underwear = random(1,14)>>

<center>\s\n<img src="0crystalball1.gif">Your Happy Happy Fortune is:<img src="0crystalball2.gif">\n<<if $fortune eq "1">>\n"Be like Confucius. Be always confused."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "2">>\n"Never forget a friend. Specially if he owes you money."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "3">>\n"You might win the lottery if you actually play."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "4">>\n"You suck!"\n<<elseif $fortune eq "5">>\n"Beauty is only skin deep. So you better show skin."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "6">>\n"The road to riches has a huge toll."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "7">>\n"Don't judge a book by it's cover for you are not a judge."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "8">>\n"A person who doesn't look back has a broken neck."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "9">>\n"Always borrow money from a pessismist. He won't expect it back."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "10">>\n"Fall in love with a mortician. They take care of the fallen."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "11">>\n"When you drink to forget, pay in advance."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "12">>\n"Celebrate your birthday every year."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "13">>\n"Don't forget to breathe."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "14">>\n"Sleeping is essential to wake up to a brighter tomorrow."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "15">>\n"When nothing goes right, go left."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "16">>\n"Don't seek advice from lefty people. They are not right."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "17">>\n"Open your eyes to see."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "18">>\n"Your right hand is not your left."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "19">>\n"Aim high so as to avoid hitting low."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "20">>\n"To gain interest, go get a loan."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "21">>\n"To date somebody is to lose money."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "22">>\n"97.345% of females online are males."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "23">>\n"Yelling at your landlady gets rid of your land."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "24">>\n"A dog bone is a bone that's with a dog."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "25">>\n"The chicken crossed the road. You should too."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "26">>\n"Two minutes to midnight depends on where you are in the globe."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "27">>\n"Not all Richards are dicks."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "28">>\n"Befriend a healer for she can cast holy."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "29">>\n"Smile you beautiful monkey for you will find Mr. Right. He's holding a banana."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "30">>\n"Wake up now, lazy bum. Don't expect a good fortune if you don't move."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "31">>\n"Having a bad day? Cheer up! Tomorrow would be worse."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "32">>\n"The glass is half empty if you drink half of it's contents."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "33">>\n"The Earth is a beautiful sphere filled with life and happiness. You are not."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "34">>\n"Drops of water can penetrate a rock while you can't penetrate anything. Useless."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "35">>\n"Cats have 9 lives while you, unfortunately, have no life."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "36">>\n"Love is sweeter the second time around. You have yet to score your first."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "37">>\n"Dreams do come true. Except yours."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "38">>\n"You'll meet the girl of your dreams, in your dreams."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "39">>\n"All hopes is not lost except yours."\n<<elseif $fortune eq "40">>\n"You will feel hungry an hour from now."\n<<endif>>\nYour lucky number is: <<print $number>>\n<<if $mood eq "1">>\nYour lucky mood is: Agitated\n<<elseif $mood eq "2">>\nYour lucky mood is: Distraught\n<<elseif $mood eq "3">>\nYour lucky mood is: Happy\n<<elseif $mood eq "4">>\nYour lucky mood is: Jolly\n<<elseif $mood eq "5">>\nYour lucky mood is: Frisky\n<<elseif $mood eq "6">>\nYour lucky mood is: Devastated\n<<elseif $mood eq "7">>\nYour lucky mood is: Sad\n<<elseif $mood eq "8">>\nYour lucky mood is: Sappy\n<<elseif $mood eq "9">>\nYour lucky mood is: Mad\n<<elseif $mood eq "10">>\nYour lucky mood is: Grumpy\n<<endif>>\s\n<<if $underwear eq "1">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Black\n<<elseif $underwear eq "2">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: pink\n<<elseif $underwear eq "3">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Fuschia\n<<elseif $underwear eq "4">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Cyan\n<<elseif $underwear eq "5">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Violet\n<<elseif $underwear eq "6">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: White\n<<elseif $underwear eq "7">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Orange\n<<elseif $underwear eq "8">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Red\n<<elseif $underwear eq "9">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Magenta\n<<elseif $underwear eq "10">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Grey\n<<elseif $underwear eq "11">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Beige\n<<elseif $underwear eq "12">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Periwinkle\n<<elseif $underwear eq "13">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Blue\n<<elseif $underwear eq "14">>\nYour lucky underwear color is: Tangerine\n<<endif>>\n<a href="splash.html">Proceed to Happy Happy Chat</a>\n</center>\n\n

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